i work really hard at different jobs and do my best to enjoy and be of service at them all. i'm a year away from a Ph.D. i've been published, although only four times, but i'm working for more. sometimes i screw up and then i try to do better. i like roses and gardening and books and dogs and garlic and new orleans and france and swearing and saltwater and sweat and the words vellichor and mellange and that Paris is a place and that Paris Green is a color/poison and black leather boots and dorothy allison's "skin" and the poetry of frank o'hara and i keep reading baudrillard so that someday i'll have it and foucault's the history of sexuality is dope and the most pleasurable time i've had in years was just as much about words and narrative driving desire as it was about getting naked and yet i get messages on the internet that include pics of people's abs and comments about my ass. BLOW UP THE INTERNET.